Hard Times

I have wanted to write a post containing some of what this post will, but struggle with 'putting it out there', but I have decided that so many other adoptive mothers who have chosen to write about struggles have been so very helpful to me. So in writing this, I hope to help someone else know that they are not alone and hopefully be encouraged. I hope this is not read and labeled as ungrateful,  complaining, or depressing-but just a 'real moment' by a mom who is trying hard to live the life God has called me to. 

I have said many times adoption is an amazing journey filled with ups and downs, I guess much like any other journey in life. However, while traveling this road there are times I seem to be a bit lost. There are days/weeks that I feel I am in the middle of a very busy interstate exchange not having a clue as to what direction I need to be going or how to get there. All the while cars are zooming past me, honking, forcing me to make quick decisions, trying to read signs that seem to be in another language, all while having a car full of children wanting to know when will we be there. 

 I have really been challenged recently with trying to 'feel' what our daughter feels, having been taking from everything she knows and brought to everything unfamiliar. I am really trying hard to understand the struggles she is facing as she continues transitioning to life in our family. God is revealing more in some areas and less in others,  but am definitely feeling challenged. All six of us have faced many joys but also struggles in adapting and learning to live as a family of six. As parents we are trying to meet the needs of all our children, trying to give them or help them get all they need. Whether that is some extra one on one time,  time away from the family, or a chance to be heard, or the opportunity to fall apart-we are trying so hard to meet their needs. In doing so, I am reminded that God is indeed the only one who has the ability to meet their every need. My prayer is that we can be His servants and He can use us to be His hands and feet. Continually praying for His guidance as we continue down the journey of adoption and are currently experiencing a bit more downs than ups.

Hard times. Transitions are hard for J. Within the last few weeks there have been too many and her attitude, actions and spirit are showing it. These are hard times. I know they are hard on her. They are hard on everyone in our family. And unfortunately, some of the things we thought would be helpful are not turning out that way. Trying to decipher what works and doesn't, what is beneficial what is not. Some of you will read this and say I had no idea times were tough, others will try and figure out what the heck I am rambling about, while others might say it's about time you write a post about this-whatever you think- Thanks for reading, thanks for encouraging us and most of all thanks for praying for us. I know that in God's timing not mine, His wisdom not my inability to understand, His ways not mine-this 'season' shall too pass. I also know that God will equip me with all I need at just the right time, and sometimes not a second too soon.